Change in Plans (Big Dreams Blog Update #4)

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The Big Dreams Blog Hop is hosted by Misha Gericke and Beth Fred, and every month we gather to give updates on each of our crazy goals.

My crazy goal was to write X amount of completed stories, tally their word counts, and hit one million words.  Easy enough, right?

So when I joined in on this blog hop back in August 2013 I upped the ante and set an end date for the million words.  Sure, at the time Mother's Day 2016 (May 8th) looked reasonable enough in the middle of August.  With a 1000 days left, all I had to do was write 1000 words/daily.  Easy as pie, right?  Right?

In hindsight this was the stupidest thing I've ever done.  (Okay.  One of many stupid things I've done/continue to do. heh.)

I already talked about how scheduling really frazzles me.  But it's just a piece of the pie...(could you tell I have apple pie on mind?)

Ignore the funny three-lined border.

Speaking of pie...

But back to the chart.  The process is totally complicated, but it sums the hole I keep digging for my stories as I rest them in an ever-state of in completion.

Here's the thing.  For me it starts with patience.  No, my goal isn't to publish a book--I mean it is one day, but before that I'd have to write a story.

No agent or editor will give me the time of day if I pitched an incomplete manuscript, in other words a cardinal sin in the professional sphere of writing.  And that brings me to my first goal:  I want to finish a story.  To be more specific, my first full-length novel.  Sometime 2014 I will achieve this!  One sentence at a time until I hit 'The End'.  So simple and yet so difficult. 

Let me break it down in to six steps.  These steps kinda go down like this in my head:

"I just want to get it down now" she says.  Yeah.  My impatience is a dream-killer. (1. Patience)

"Then raise the word count.  All you gotta to do is write X amount of words every day for the next Y amount of days." (2. Word Counts and 3. Schedule)

SOMETIME LATER

"Not meeting those word counts, eh, and your deadline of Z is tomorrow!  Argh!  I rue the day I chose writing as a would-be profession!" -raises word count-

SOME MORE TIME LATER

"Okay.  Raising the word count didn't work.  Maybe I'm not meant to write, or at least ever finish something.  Fate must totally have something else planned for me. Thaaaat's it." -sits around waiting for said Plan-

"Where the heck is that Plan already?  Drat!  I could write this story, but it doesn't sound all that good anyways and nobody sane would like it--let alone love it.  Besides, is there really room for me in the publishing world?" -insert days worth of more inane reasons-

"Fine.  Fine.  I'll just write this other idea over here.  It looks way more manageable.  Yeah.  I like this new idea just fine.  Writing it will be as easy as pie..."

-vicious cycle continues-

Wrapping this post up, I have scratched out a deadline for the million words.  And it's already working magic.  I don't feel pressured to write 1000/daily, which works just fine with me.  The patience is a daily struggle though.  And I always want to jump ship on my current WIP for ad infinitum excuses.  This is when my fears and doubts are the most effective at blindsiding me.

I totally got this.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna go have that pie.