BOOK REVIEW (27): Immortal Hearts (Vampire Kisses #9)

BOOK REVIEW:

Immortal Hearts

This review was a long time coming. Frankly I didn’t think I’d be writing this until the end of the year, especially since I kinda went on a dry spell reading-wise last month.

But with CampNaNo revising going bust and picking up a reading challenge I managed to squeeze the final books of the Vampire Kisses series in my schedule. And voila, the conclusion to the series after nearly a decade with these books…

RECAP. In a former post I mentioned I stumbled across Ellen Screiber’s YA PNR series in 2005. Back then I didn’t know Twilight existed (that came at the close of 2007) and I got to that point in the Anita Blake: Vampire Hunter series were I wanted to burn all the then-existing books (I think Micah was slated for a release then.)

I broke away from the VK series purely because I hate waiting. I’m not a patient person when it comes to the traditional book schedule of a year. I just can’t do it. So usually I’m a late band wagoner waiting until the final book in a series’ releases before I dive in and rush to catch up by that final publication date.

Case in point with Immortal Hearts: this 9^th and final installment of the Vampire Kisses series released in May 2012. Holy crud! More than 2 years ago, and I remember stalking Ms. Schreiber’s twitter to catch the title reveal. Also learned back then that there was to be a book 10 called Stormy Nights, but I think it was pulled and Immortal Hearts was announced to be the final book. Fun fact! Although there is no book 10 (and to be honest, I don’t even know whether to be sad or happy about this) Stormy Nights made it as a chapter title in Immortal Hearts.

So here we are with the review. What can I say after this long-ass journey?

Yay! First of all to me for getting through these books—

You see Immortal Hearts follows the same trajectory as every one of its eight predecessors. There’s a mini recap. Night life seems swell until Raven begins pestering Alexander to bite her AGAIN. Alexander—and we’re reminded he’s a gentleman vampire unlike that ruffian Jagger who’ll stick his fangs anywhere—denies his instinct for blood and mating (yeah…apparently he really wants to make Raven his vampire-mate which sounds like a sophisticated form of healthy teenage curiosity to me). Some family member (or acquaintance), in this case family, from Alexander’s world makes a cross-Atlantic trip to drop in on Dullsville, U.S.A. This visitor is Alexander’s little sister, Athena Sterling, also affectionately known as Stormy. Visitor causes indirect (and/or direct) problems to Raven and Alexander’s nocturnal love and there is a recapitalization of the series’ overarching internal conflict in which Raven doubts her wish to become a vampire and Alexander confesses his desire to bite Raven and make her wishes come true despite totally thinking he’s going to ruin her life as a human.

Now that doesn’t sound like I like this book? Well although that’s true, it’s kinda half true. Overall the series is like average. Decent. I didn’t come away thinking I wasted my time, but I sure as hell will never read these books again if I can help it.

What I liked:

1)      Athena “Stormy” Sterling – I’ve realized I like most of the visitors to Dullsville, because they give me a break from Raven + Alexander action. Athena makes it on both my lists, but right here I’ll mention what I did like about her. I liked that she wasn’t all over Raven immediately. And even when she was it wasn’t solely a Raven thing. She was friendly to everybody.

2)    The sibling scenes – there are more scenes with Raven and her little brother, Billy/Billy Boy/Nerd Boy. And I usually find the author does exceptionally well capturing the sibling rivalry. Also learned author had two brothers and that she might be drawing from her own experiences possibly? Mhm. That would be interesting to confirm. But Billy plays more of a role in this novel. His name pops up a lot and not just in casual mention. Like he’s there again since he kinda took a back seat after a large mention in book 4, Dance with a Vampire.

3)     Not everyone get a HEA! What? Why am I excited about that? Mostly because I was steeling myself to a really sickening happily-ever-after where all teen lovers in the book get together and spin yarn about how they’ll spend their mortality or immortality together.

What I disliked:

1)      Athena “Stormy” Sterling – told you she makes it on my other list. What I disliked about Stormy was how she came off. She’s a wish-washy character and, though she’s much stronger at the beginning, by the end she is a caricature. There’s a scene where she confronts Jagger and the rest of the Maxwell siblings about something (I won’t say what due to spoilers) and she manages to tidy up what appears to be an eternal feud between the Maxwell and Sterling dynasties. I mean, wth. She’s twelve. C’mon. Was I to believe that all it took was a wrist-slap for everyone to get along?

2)    The cheesy dialogue and constructed actions of the characters. I was jarred out of the story so much times. Particularly every time Raven says something I wouldn’t expect came out of the mouth of a seventeen-year-old. And then there’s the back-and-forth ping-pong debate about turning Raven into a vampire were excuses to inject the novel with thematic messages. Like they felt like lectures amounting into vast pages.

3)     Usually I’m not complaining about a book’s pace, but MAHGAH this book was fast. As in nothing-happened-but-everything-fell-into-place fast. I already mentioned the backstory to Immortal Hearts and the Vampire Kisses series and how there was to be a book 10, but I guess the contract came in for only one more book and not two. So this final installment also happens to be the longest book in the series at 58K. Books 1-7 averaged at 36-40K so there’s a pretty big word leap. My theory is, and this is because it felt like this reading the book, this story is an amalgam of a would-be other story in the series. Like books 9 and 10 were mashed up and the mash-up result is Immortal Hearts. I say this because there seems to be two plots going on. You have the Stormy-arriving and vampire-secret discovery thing and then the Raven-wanting-to-get-bitten plot.

Just read the book and you’ll understand what I mean. It feels very disjointed and comes off as a helter-skelter read.

Okay. So it’s obvious I’m pretty divided with the series’ concluding novel,  but also with the series as a whole. I started and continued reading the books because I enjoyed Ellen Schreiber’s humorous approach to the whole teen paranormal wangst. Which BTW was pre-Twilight folks!

But by the end I’m no longer seeing this as a comedy (maybe even a satire) on YA PNR and romantic comedy film genre. Like suddenly the author took herself way too seriously and got sucked in by the whole crappy romance.

Speaking of romantic comedies, there’s actually a rain scene, too.

You know the reunion scene after the black moment in romantic comedies. Lovers chase after each other in the rain and confess their wrongdoings and proclaim their eternal love for one another, hug and kiss in the rain yadda yadda blah bleck!

Yet I still can’t find that regret in me. I don’t hate the books, and I don’t love them. But I DO recommend them as a great summer/leisure read. They’re light-hearted at the very least and escapism when the plot gets good, which is rare… And if you’re not much of a YA PNR reader, use the Vampire Kisses series to test the waters as it will do either of two things: 1) have you running for the hills from all PNR things, or 2) ease you through to more mature writing—not to say the immaturity of these books were a bad thing. I enjoyed them whenever I enjoyed them.

And that's why with sincerity I say, thanks for the read, Vampire Kisses, I'll miss you.

My verdict:

✮✮✮

(3 stars)

BOOK REVIEW (26): The Billionaire's Baby SOS (The Larkville Legacy #8)

BOOK REVIEW:

The Billionaire's Baby SOS

I’ll preface this review by saying I’ve had an exciting month reading-wise. I’m expanding to test out what kind of romances I enjoy, so I’ve been reading a lot of romances outside the Vampire Kisses series, which is a YA PNR.

This next book is another Harlequin and another first read from a category romance series of theirs called Harlequin Romance. Fun fact! Harlequin Romance was the first series published by the romance publishing giant. Cool, huh?

If the title isn’t self-explanatory The Billionaire’s Baby SOS has a baby trope in it. And the blurb at the back of the book will also give away another trope, often closely associated with the babies, the nanny trope. Oh, yeah, and there’s also a billionaire. Yup. That’s what the title will surmise. Luckily this review isn’t a title review, so let’s go beyond the title shall we?

Before we dive into the review though, I’d like to give you the warning I wish I had. As far as I can see the hard cover version of The Billionaire’s Baby SOS does not state it is part of an 8-book series and with my crap luck this is the eighth and final story of that miniseries. Personally I don’t think that this book is a spoiler at all. The other characters from the 7 other stories are all mentioned and/or make appearances at the end of the book, but nothing is given away as to how the couples met or any major plot details shared from the rest of the series.

But if that kinda thing bothers you, there’s your warning. Cherish it! J

Okay, first I really found myself enjoying the baby thing! It’s a new thing for me. I know some people either A) have tried reading romances with babies, but hated it, or B) never bothered to try because it’s a turn off. In my case it was neither. I haven’t read one prior to this novel and it’s not my style to judge a book entirely by the cover. (All right. Sometimes I judge by the cover…and title, oddly enough.)

I’m glad I didn’t though. Baby Bella was adorable! And she wasn’t really either a prop or such a significant distraction from the story that I forgot it was a romance. Let me emphasize that. I never forgot it was a romance. Author Susan Meier doesn’t allow you with all the scenes wrought with sexual tension between heroine Claire and hero Matt.

Claire isn’t actually a nanny, but I’ll let you read and find out what I mean by that. What I liked about Claire is her interaction with Bella and Matt in the book, both together and separately. I realize I really I’m a sucker for these sorts of books were romance is tinged with family elements, so it’s not entirely the H/h in a bubble of their own, oblivious to the world around them. Not as romantic as it sounds when you’re actually reading 190+ pages.

Claire has her problems, too. Her backstory made me cry…well, almost cry. It definitely made me uncomfortable with sorrow. The gist of that story is she’s learned to hold onto the good/positivity in her life, and Matt and Bella are the upside in her life right now.

I didn’t like that her compassion came off fake. I mean she did a lot of over-and-beyond tasks for Matt that seemed unnatural considering they’re virtual strangers even with the lust. Then there was the conversations with her boss that came off really fake.

But for better or worse our story’s billionaire falls for this “little slip of a woman” (p.200)—which btw is the strangest saying and entirely out of context with this time period.

Yeah. So Matt falls for Claire hard, and first it’s just the usual physical attraction, but then that unnatural compassion of hers is what tugs and thaws this Wall Street Ice Man’s heart. I liked Matt, too. He had such a complex childhood and he isn’t alpha, like at all. And I think the nickname he’s given “the Ice Man” doesn’t’ do his character in action much justice.

He’s not an A-hole, and he isn’t cold-hearted and constantly shrugging off Claire. He doesn’t hover whenever she’s taking care of Bella either. I guess I’m coming off of reading some alpha males in romances and I’ve decided I’m thoroughly disenchanted by the magic of the weirdly possessive, controlling alpha hero.

And since the book is talking babies and it’s all about fatherhood and the challenges associated with this half of parenting, let’s talk Matt and his new status as daddy. IRL I find it funny when a guy (or girl for that matter) who isn’t really experienced with children is forced to interact with them. I don’t have wicked baby skills/experience myself, but I’m always ready to learn. (Yes. I do love infants.)

I was expecting a romanticized version of fatherhood, and I got it—like there was no messy poop stain smearing an expensive tie—but I only got half of it.

Unlike Claire’s freaky-sized compassion, Matt takes the fatherhood slowly and his progress is natural. I mean, near the end it’s rushed a bit, but he isn’t like SUPERDAD suddenly.

Same goes for Claire and Matt’s relationship. The story takes place over the course of, I think, one week. Or one week and a bit, but Claire and Matt jump in the bandwagon of love and rush into their relationship and “I love yous” much, much quicker. And I’m not an insta-love fan at all, but after spending a week caring for a child together with all that crazy sexual tension I totally get where they’re coming from. (Not entirely, but we’re all cool.) Also by sexual tension, I mean just that. Lots of hot and broody looks, awkward silences, lip biting and stroking, kissing and caressing. But no sex.

I wouldn't call the story a SWEET romance. But I would say that it is entirely devoid of a sex scene, closed door or open. Claire is adamant to hold onto her panties a little longer, and Matt is totally cool with that. It's hinted that there's plans for sex at the end of the book, but it isn't explored more than one line of a mention of roses and champagne awaiting their shared bedroom.

Anyways by the book’s closure I figured there would be some life hurdles awaiting Claire and Matt. And Bella too. You know besides the conflicts wrapped up in the story in the HEA.

Not a baby-romance fan? I’m not going to convert you, but I hope you’ll consider reading about this trio’s story.

My verdict:

✮✮✮✮.5

(4.5 stars)

This or That (Big Dreams Blog Update #10)

As this month closes another Update Day calls, so here it is. I answer.
What is Update Day you ask? Started by masterminds (or is that evil geniuses?) Misha Gericke and Beth Fred the Big Dreams blog hop follows the journey of 18 bloggers and their crazy, big dreams. And not all of those dreams are writing- or reading-related either. I've seen some crazy ones, like an ultra marathon of 100K or creating a new writing genre--check out these dreamers and cheer them on, or join us with your own whacky big dream! Click the icon above (w/ credit here to Shah Wharton).

Now I was glancing back at my last Update post for the previous month and I realize I made some lofty goals—especially in the writing area.

…actually just with the writing.

You see July is the second CampNaNo and my goal was to revise the first draft of my contemporary romance from June, but life and school (mostly school!) got in the way. SO after two days of little writing I figured something had to give. If I wasn’t going to write, I couldn’t well sit around on my butt and do nothing.

And that brings me to the flash topic of this post. Essentially I should call it “This or That: budgeting your time wisely” because something I’ve realized over the past year is how I tend to view my time.

A year ago my relationship with time was poor. I was always finding ways to “kill it” or “waste it” doing anything: playing video games, watching TV/movies, etc. I wasn’t really approaching it as a precious gift and when I really need it—like when I’m trying to cram finals or finish an essay the night before it’s due—I recognize just how important it is.

I’m babbling, but my point is I’ve learned that if I don’t want to do something and if I’m going to step away that I should find something else to do with my time. In this case I wasn’t in the right frame of mind to write, and I was afraid it would affect my studies if I forced my butt in the chair to write. So I did the next best thing: I set a goal instead to read.

I was a few books shy of the 75% mark of my reading/reviewing challenge and I thought it would be a great time to read and alleviate my mind from all the studying on the side.

So I read and read and read, and the last 3 weeks flew by. I just finished summer school and I can’t believe how nice it was balancing school with reading, especially when I often spent a lot of those nights curled up at the end of the day with a book in bed.

And this is the way I hit my goal. It snuck up on me really, kinda like how these Update posts sneak up at the end of the month, wondering where the time went—“I swear it was only the beginning of July yesterday, wasn’t it?”

Of course I have new goals to set for the coming month. With school out and the summer still oh-so young, I’m going to divvy my time up by exploring some local towns nearby with my family, continue reading and reviewing, and picking up where I left off with my writing/revising.

In order to ensure I don’t waste the 5 weeks I have left before school starts, I’ve decided to start a blog series of infrequent, but at least weekly check-ins on the how-goes-it of my revision process. I’m actually starting tomorrow, but I’ll probably not post until the end of the weekend or something.

To round it up, if you find you’re stuck doing one thing than broaden your scope and find something else to fulfill your time. Don’t want to write? Then read. Not in the mood for reading, you say, then exercise, draw, bake, clean, compose an interpretative dance and perform it for your family/friends—just do something else. Something fun and creative and exciting and keep moving forward.

That sums up my July.

Stay tuned for August.

BOOK REVIEW (25): The Texas Ranger's Reward (Undercover Heroes #3)

BOOK REVIEW:

The Texas Ranger's Reward

Earlier this month I kicked off my reading challenge with a Harlequin Superromance, which was then a new category line for me. So when I had a choice between reading another Superromance and Harlequin’s American Romance series—yet another new Harlequin line, I decided to go with the American Romance.

Thankfully more than a year ago I subscribed to the Harlequin’s Reading Services and I got 2 free American Romance books. I eenie’d and found my head burrowed in Rebecca Winters’ The Texas Ranger’s Reward.

Now I was at least halfway through the book before I decided to search the author up on the interwebs and I found out the book is actually part of a trilogy. Yes. What is with all the trilogies right?

Naw. That wasn’t what I was thinking. I was thinking ‘please let this be the first in the trilogy’. Unfortunately it wasn’t, AND I’m warning you now. The end ruins a heckuva lot of the plot of the first story in the trilogy. I mean, A LOT, as in the mystery subplot of that novel is completely blown away.

Which is fine because I don’t blame the author. I blame myself for ignoring the shiny badge on the cover with the overarching trilogy name. Shoulda known what that was… -sigh-.

Thankfully I really had no regrets reading The Texas Ranger’s Reward.

Set in my fourth favourite state—yes, I have favourite states—the novel follows the story of orthopedic therapist Melissa Dalton and former Texas Ranger-now-P.I.

When I read the back of this book I thought it was a twin trope. As in the heroine, Melissa, was Travis’ late wife’s identical twin sister.

BTW I’m not spoiling anything. It’s all in the back cover blurb. Go. Read it.

And spoiler! It’s not a twin trope story. Melissa isn’t related to Travis’ wife, so no extra melodrama. Phew.

But she looks like her, and that’s what makes this story really cool to read.

“Have you ever been told you looked like someone else or that someone else looked like you? Do you like being compared?”

The author, Rebecca Winters, asks this question in her ‘Dear Reader’* section at the front of the novel. My answer is “yes” and “it depends”. If we’re talking celebrity look-a-like—I’m kidding.

But it does depend. For instance I’ve been compared to my mom before by her friends. Sometimes I look like her and other times I sound like her, or it is other little nuances I share with her.

Looking at it this way I don’t mind. But if I’m being compared to a really nasty-piece-of-work human, I’m better off not knowing what you think. Thank you. Don’t come again.

Veering back from my tangent into the review, we get Melissa’s response to this question in the novel when Travis tells her early on and in a very up front manner I enjoyed that Melissa looked like his deceased wife and mother to his seven-year-old son.

Naturally Melissa is totally freaked out, and it doesn’t help that she’s attracted to Travis. Especially when she can’t bring herself to ask him: So is it lust/love on your side, too? Or is it that I’m your type—as in your dead wife-type?

Big, big questions. And Travis better answer them right or no nookie! In all seriousness he’s a single father though, and it isn’t entirely about how he feels about Melissa. See this is how single parenting works. At least good and healthy single parenting works. Disclaimer: I’m not from a one parent family. My parents have been happily married for more years than I’ve been born, and hopefully many more years at that. BUT I do understand that for a moment if I put myself in Travis’ pants I would be considering how my child felt about a possible love interest.

And like a good father Travis worries if his son sees his mother in Melissa. Which is a prime concern—a perfect seat of main romantic conflict if I do say so myself, and I say “oh yeah”!

Besides that main conflict there is a mystery/suspense subplot. Actually 2 kinda. One is more overarching and that’s the mystery one, and the other is a short suspense ride filling the hole that the mystery subplot left.

What I didn’t like was everything was wrapped up in a neat bow. All tucked in and tidy presentation that was gag-worthy fake. Really? There was some ridiculous melodrama at the end of this novel.

BTW coming out of having just read/reviewed a sexier romance, I’ve learned through experience that American Romance is behind-doors sexy time. As in scene-blank and couple is laying in each other’s arms after the deed. I’m cool with that, but for those of you looking for on-screen nookie this book is not your friend.

Still it’s a great read. A fun couple of days spent avoiding studying for finals, and what more could I ask for, right?

My verdict:

✮✮✮✮

(4 stars)

BOOK REVIEW (24): An Exquisite Challenge (The Delicious De Campos #2)

BOOK REVIEW:

An Exquisite Challenge

For some strange reason I ordered books 1 & 2 of The Delicious De Campos trilogy, but forgot the 3^rd story.

Well, that’s for another day I suppose. Right now I DO have book 2 and I’ve read it soooo that means another review! Yay.

Now that Lilly and Riccardo De Campo got their HEA, Alexandra and Gabriele get their own stab at ‘The End”. A quick refresher is an order at this point, and it’s totally spoiler-free: Alex is the twin sister of Lilly. And Gabe is Riccardo’s younger brother, or the middle child mediator of the three De Campo men.

-End Refresher-

In An Exquisite Challenge Alex and Gabe are forced together because of dents in their career paths. You see, they’re both actually really admirably dedicated to their jobs. Despite the fact that we’re reminded Alex is an Iowa farm girl-turned-extraordinaire entrepreneur and Gabe’s fortune allowed him to be born into a wealthy family, but of course privilege doesn’t buy talent, skill and hard work.

I have to admit, Jennifer Hayward comes a long way with characterization in her sophomore novel. I really loved Gabe much more than Riccardo. The alpha male thing doesn’t always work for me…which is odd because Harlequin Presents/M&B Modern Romance lives for the alpha. But I do believe it takes a lot of skill to pull off an alpha character without making him come off as a jackass.

There was more layer to the story as well. Gabe actually—surprise!—had an on-screen passion. With Riccardo there was racing, but he never got behind the wheel on a racetrack. Gabe loves his wine-making and the wine industry and you can hear it, feel it, see it—and I guess it helped that I learned stuff about wine-making. I mean, who knew you had to actually air wine? I thought people did that in movies and shows for the “suave appearance”… Haha. Can you tell I’m totally alcohol abstinent?

But it was the same betweent he twin sisters! Lilly was just…there.

Alex actually HAD a job. Like she did stuff. Important money-making stuff. What I mean is that Lilly had a job, yes. She was actually a successful physiotherapist. But we never got to see her in action. The first story’s plot and word count of the category romance didn’t allow for it.

Because Alex’s job as a public relation specialist/person is a key factor in the external conflict of this story, readers get to see more of the heroine’s life outside the romance.

And speaking of the romance, let’s talk Gabe + Alex, you know, together.

They have a history. A short, but tumultuous history kicking the book off from page 1, but you need to read the story to find out what that is.

They’re also fire-water, hot-cold, black-white, -insert other opposites to get point across that there is an opposites attract trope here-.

But like all really different people on the outside, on the inside they’re both nursing broken hearts from previous love slights, so the internal conflict is born! Dun dun.

But on a more serious note, I loved this novel because it touched on an important topic. One I’m going to go ahead and assume that the average person doesn’t expect a romance novel to dwell into: the extramarital affair/cheating.

I mentioned this already in my review for the first book in Ms. Hayward’s trilogy because Lilly and Riccardo’s story touched on it a bit, but it also kinda left it hanging.

An Exquisite Challenge doesn’t. At least not nearly as much as its predecessor does, and I’m glad for it. It was hard to read, but I had this internal dialogue and it made me more involved in the character’s decision-making process and the consequences of their actions.

Trust me when I say it isn’t a black and white decision here. There’s a lot to swallow in this book, and it’ll make you question where you stand as of now on the issue of cheating.

…

And I’ve said all I’m going to say about that. Now go out and buy the book! Read it and enjoy! Just one final note as well, this trilogy contains three companions not sequels.

You can read An Exquisite Challenge (book 2) without having read The Divorce Party (book 1). There isn’t a lot of know-how from book 1 that can’t be readily understood in book 2.

My verdict:

✮✮✮✮✮

(5 stars)

BOOK REVIEW (23): Cryptic Cravings (Vampire Kisses #8)

BOOK REVIEW:

Cryptic Cravings

And here we are with the penultimate book in the Vampire Kisses series. I started reading VK1-3 during my 2013 winter holiday break, so this was a LONG time in coming. I broke off from the series after book 6 (Royal Blood) released, but I had been following the release of the series throughout the next few years. And I’ve always been dying to find out whether Raven was turned into a vampire or not.

Sadly this book doesn’t answer that HUGE mystery/romance conflict just yet.

Still we have a lot going on in VK8, at least enough to tie up a couple points.

Cryptic Cravings picks up a year after Alexander Sterling moves into the Mansion on Benson Hill and Raven’s dull and bloodless existence in her small town, Dullsville suddenly brightens—or is that darkens?—with this fated meeting between our series’ couple.

Now that a year has passed Raven realizes that her relationship with Alexander is culminating to something…but just what, Cryptic Cravings doesn’t say. I mean, that title is a dead giveaway. There are a lot of cravings, mostly of the blood and teen sexual wangst variety, and even more secrets—some revealed at the end, some still remain hidden.

We get more teen male vampy heartthrob scenes in this one, too. I have a crush on Sebastian and Jagger, so we get to see a whole lot more of them both! –squee-

Raven’s bully-slash-secret admirer Trevor Mitchell’s kinda growing on me, too. I always liked how author Ellen Schreiber writes the witty, cute banter between Raven and her “nemesis” (btw, every time I read that name for Trevor all I think about is Resident Evil. And I srsly doubt that’s what the author was intending. Just throwing that image out there to pollute your mind, too.)

And here. Why don’t you take a picture too?

Meet Nemesis. He isn’t a “blonde jock” as you can see...

So this book didn’t fare any better than its predecessors. As far as I’m concerned the series is just a bunch of “okay, they’re fine but they ain’t gonna get better than this” reads.

My problems with Cryptic Cravings are problems I found in the other books, but some that I haven’t mentioned yet.

One: Raven isn’t a normal teen.

What 16/17-year-old uses the word “nefarious”? Hell. What grown-ass 21^st century adult uses the word “nefarious”? And it isn’t even this book. I haven’t really mentioned it much, mostly cause I figure I’ve been trying to suppress it but Raven doesn’t sound like a regular, red-blooded teenager. I mean, especially since we’re supposed to believe she doesn’t care about school all that much and she’s not very book-savvy. This isn’t the first time either—just in the last book there was a scene where her best friend, Becky gets injured scrapping her knee or something and Raven asks for a tourniquet. Okay. If that doesn’t make you stop reading I salute you.

A frickin’ tourniquet.

What? When did asking for a Band-Aid or bandage go out of vogue?

And even if she was, it would still make me suspicious if anyone IRL convo used the word “nefarious” in ways like this (I only started documenting the use of Schreiber’s pet word from p. 65 onwards. Who knows how many times she used it earlier?):

“I’m sorry—I didn’t mean that about you. I meant nefarious vampires,” I said… (p.65)

“You know I mean nefarious, unknown vampires.” (p.76)

AND A PAGE LATER…

“…But if they get wind of anything nefarious, then they will want to shut down…” (p.77)

Alexander kept a watchful eye on the incoming boxes, making sure that there were no nefarious items or clues… (p.82)

Jagger sidled up to Becky. I was ready to pounce if he did anything nefarious to my best friend. (p.89)

Lol. Personally I think Becky could use something nefarious done to her… xD Dirty mind is very dirty.

At least it wouldn’t have been caused by Jagger and his nefarious plans. (p.119)

It was worse. Far worse than opening the present to find an empty box. What I saw was by far more nefarious and cunning. Trevor really got me this time. (p.161)

Got her a birthday gift! Yeah! And a really pretty one, you guys, I mean—this girl I swear, Raven needs to be killed like for good.

I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry, or do both to save time. I was so frustrated I’m glad I got a good night’s sleep before I decided to write this review. I mean, WHAT. Anyways, after this my brain shut down.

Also, Raven is starting to piss me off. Unfortunately this story is told in first-person from her perspective so I’m forced to stick it out if I wanna see this series through to the final book—we’re one away now!

Which brings me to point two: Raven’s love triangle FAIL..

Now if you haven’t read the series, and to be honest I don’t know how clear I’ve been in these impromptu reviews of these books thus far, but the romance mostly goes like this: Alexander + Raven. And then there’s really a bunch of Raven admirers that don’t really get the full access to Raven’s midnight lip lock sessions: Trevor and Jagger, some random vamp guys from Book 5 (Coffin Club) and very briefly Sebastian.

Then in Cryptic Cravings Raven decides she’s bothered that Trevor is seeing a new girl, one of her vampire friends, so she throws down like a jealous hog. For reals.

Like she doesn’t want the so-called preppy snob, WANT want him—but she won’t let him be with someone else who does?

Forget turning into a bat, Raven, because you’re already a beyotch!

The problem is that the whole Trevor-Raven thing is SO ridiculously forced, like I can almost hear the author’s cogs working post-Twilight and jumping on the love triangle crap—sure it was pretty obvious reading it that Trevor does have a thing for Raven despite subjecting her to torture BUT Raven never fell for it before. Especially since having met Alexander and they hit it off which was a redeeming quality of hers—her devotion to Alexander and their love and her dream to be a vampire and successfully combine her aspirations for teen romance w/ immortality.

And I could go on and on about the problems with this book. I did enjoy the fast pace. Definitely something I can’t complain about with the Vampire Kisses series. I don’t ever get bogged down.

I really love that cover.

I also like the hook at the end that kinda really works in forcing me to read the final book in the series, and not only because it’s the final book and then I’m forever/eternally/immortally free from Raven and her craziness!

My verdict:

✮✮.5

(2.5 stars)

BOOK REVIEW (22): The Divorce Party (The Delicious De Campos #1)

BOOK REVIEW:

The Divorce Party

Taking a breather from vampires and their vampy world, I decided my next read would remain romance but that I’d move into the contemporary domain.

So although the next read lacks rapidly and often inexplicable eye colour changing—eyes do “darken” a lot, and there’s a lot of the same angsty melodrama: overall, we’re good.

First off to clear the air the title of this book needs to be explored a bit.

I mean who knew there were things called divorce parties? You think I would know considering I’ve heard of weirder things, but I guess you wouldn’t really think divorce = PARTAY OVER HERE!... But in a way I would.

Like if a couple really hated each other and finally sealed the deal with a legal document than logically a party with friends and family, you know, separately makes total sense. Or at least a silent hurray over those papers.

And I guess that’s what makes this one unique: author Jennifer Hayward has her hero inviting, yes you heard right, inviting his soon-to-be (and in her opinion if he’d given her the asked for divorce his shoulda-been) former wife to their joint divorce party.

If this wasn’t a M&B Modern/Harlequin Presents—a line known for their financial fantasy contemp romances—then I would have thought hero Riccardo De Campo and heroine Lilly were trying to combine their parties to save on expenses.

Then I find out their house was a purchase of 35 million dollars! As Riccardo put it so often in the novel: Dio! Out goes the ‘expense’ theory, so what could possibly be a good enough reason to invite your not quite ex-wife to a divorce party? I’d tell you but then there wouldn’t be a point to get you to read it, now would there?

Okay, enough divorce celebratory talk. For anyone interested in more filler on the topic of divorce parties, this recent article might be of interest: http://www.theglobeandmail.com/life/relationships/breakup-blowouts-how-the-divorce-party-is-coming-on-strong-for-young-divorcees/article19349741/

Back to the review!
I really enjoyed Ms. Hayward’s debut. She’s a fellow Canadian so I’m totally biased—I joke!—but seriously, this book is a fast-paced, emotional read. You’ll laugh, maybe cry, maybe rage, maybe roll your eyes, but you’ll like it enough to not regret reading it.

The story follows Lilly De Campo neé Anderson as she actually arrives to her husband’s divorce party shindig. Yah! Girl got guts…or a heck load of curiosity and tbh, I don’t blame her. I’d probably go, too. Though totally incognito.

And she goes and crazy crap happens involving a verbal contract/promises and the divorce is postponed until the end of a six-month deal. And once again you gotta read to find out what the funny fine print entails.

But of course they still party enough for Lilly to pass out (I joke she passes out for migraine-related reasons) and Riccardo to get her back into their marriage bed.

There are twists and turns and the book, like most short contemporary romances particularly of this publisher’s line focuses on the couple and their internal conflicts. Essentially what secrets and actions keep them apart?

This being said then don’t expect an external antagonist. If there is one he’s relatively minor and not really an “antagonist” at all—I said there were twists, right?

As far as sex scenes go this had pretty racy descriptions. Hot, hot for sure so if you’re not into that thing but cool with skimming through they don’t take up huge amounts of space in the book—like 2-5 pages tops of a total of ~182.

What I didn’t like was few and far between. Before I read this book a lot of reviewers who gave it 2 stars below complained about the heroine and how she was SO WRONG for cheating on her husband during the year they were separated. These same reviewers apparently read the whole book and as I read those last pages myself I began wondering if we had read the same book.

(“Hello fellow reviewers, we are all reading The Divorce Party by Jennifer Hayward right? RIGHT? DIO!”)

Seriously weird stuff considering I didn’t find Lilly in the wrong at all. Personally Riccardo was slightly more at fault, and I wished the whole debacle with the doctored photos (read it and you’ll know what I speak of!) was just brushed under the rug. But I don’t know what the heck I really expected—for the story to info-dump techy info on me while the photos were traced back to the source.

Though I definitely don’t want that *shudders* that hardly excuses the way this major source of long-ass conflict was handled.

Re-enactment (not actual textual event):

setting some really expensive island villa or something
Riccardo: I swear those are doctored, you gots to believe me Lilly!

Lilly: Uhh…fine. I guess. I mean it’s not like you and all.

Riccardo: Yeah totally. No where were we mi caro?

Now as for the whole cheating crime blackening Lilly against readers/reviewers let me put it this way: say you're married and your partner refuses to offer you a divorce on w/e messed up grounds--why the eff wouldn't you try to move on anyways? I mean, and this is no spoiler, Lilly is trying to divorce Riccardo for a year. The party doesn't take place the morning she decides to leave his ass--it takes place a friggin' whole year after she choose to separate their living situation.

If anyone refuses you a divorce then THEY'RE in the wrong. And if you have decided to enter the dating scene then why the eff shouldn't you be able to? Technically, yes technically it's extramarital relations, but I think a marriage ends the moment one party decides it ain't a mutual affair anymore.  And no, I won't get into a cultural or religious debate about it.

These are my opinions, okay?

But read the book and maybe post your own thoughts in the form of a review.

I do tip my proverbial hat off to Ms. Hayward for tapping into a sensitive subject. I’m currently in the middle of playing catch up with ABC’s The Mistresses and this whole extramarital affair and divorce topics are just buzzing through my head as of late.

Regardless of what you think, please enjoy The Divorce Party for yourself and don’t let a review sway you from reading it and making your own conclusions about it. Cool?

Chill.

My verdict:

✮✮✮✮

(4 stars)

BOOK REVIEW (21): Love Bites (Vampire Kisses #7)

BOOK REVIEW:

Love Bites

Hey this is a first! Usually I let book reviews sit in my head for a bit after I’m done reading the book—half due to laziness and the other 50% because I’m afraid to be too bias. Especially if I don’t like the book.

Book Seven of the teen-seduction vamp dramedy Vampire Kisses is, thankfully, not a crappy book. But once again it didn’t exactly soar past the 3ish star-limit that seems to be stagnating my opinion of this series.

Love Bites is meh—okay—just fine. Sure there’s yet another vampire introduced, and this one of the non-parent, oldsy variety, but it doesn’t save the plot and the omgah-bad levels of humour.

I know that the series is getting close to the end (there’s two more books after #7), Raven’s whole wish to become a vampire has to have its conclusion and all so gurrrl has to worry about whether her man gonna grant their love immortality and shiz, but but…Raven made a lot of statements that drove me up the wall.

Her desperation to be an immortal oozes from her gooey teen pores—actually she usually describes herself and all the other teen goth/vampires as having flawless pale skin… Anyways throughout the other books Raven has casually thrown other girls (especially non-Goth girls who aren’t her blonde, preppy (tho I’d just call it upbeat—and hey! Who doesn’t like an upbeat personality?), “normal” best friend Becky) under the proverbial bus. Basically she came off as a witch—a desperate clingy witch.

And, gah!, Alexander can do no wrong. Whatever bit of normalcy and flaw he’d shown in the other books (in particular #4 where he confesses to Raven about his thirst and his selfishness to wanting to turn her) is gone. Gone, gone, poof.

He was always in the better.

The other reason I keep giving this series a mediocre rating is that any sort of conflict is brushed under the rug. Quickly resolved in the matter of a few pages at tops: your boyfriend isn’t sayin’ he loves you—no problem, he just has to blurt it out in front of an audience and it’s all patched up. –gag-

Still I liked Sebastian and this book offers a bit of Jagger, so all the male vampy goodness is rolled up into one. Thanks Ellen Schreiber's fingers.

My verdict:

✮✮✮.5

(3.5 stars)