New Years, Not-so New Dreams (Big Dreams Blog Update #3)

Happy New Years’ Eve fellow bloggers and readers!

Yes, also happy belated Update Day.  Not much has passed since the last post.  December was another month for celebrating my second 50K+ on a second fanfiction I was working on.

And shortly after I promptly abandoned this story, too… *sigh*

Surprisingly I’m not as upset as I was the first time, and it’s not all ‘cause I’ve been numbing myself with holiday treats.  Actually though I haven’t completed my 2013 goal of completing a novel, I have gained a lot of knowledge about myself.

For instant, I work best from 3am-8am, and then I slowly begin to crash creative-wise.  I also learned I’m not a plotter at all!  This was a huge shock.  One of the things I love to do when I get an idea is write every little detail, even the meaningless ones (i.e. a character’s blood type, although in my defence I do have a reason for doing this -insert future blog post link here-).  So I’m not a plotter and I sure as heck knew I wasn’t a pantser.  I did do a blog post on this, the whole planter thing.

Yeah, I’m also not much of a snacker while I write.  I actually think eating distracts me, but I might pop in a bite here and there while plotting away from the computer.

I got a blog, and yeah, not a year wasted at all.

So without further blabbing, here are my 2014 writing/reading-related goals:

30 books for 2014:  For this one I set aside a separate tab—page tab is at the top of this blog—to record my process as I complete each book.   All-in-all a manageable reading load.

Finish an industry standard full-length (that’d be 50K+) novel:  To help motivate me I’m kinda going to be doing the 750-word/day challenge at 750words.com.  The site is created and hosted by Buster Benson.  They have monthly challenges for writing, as I’m sure you've guessed, 750 words daily, and they offer treats.  Adding to this, though I have no Facebook account and don’t plan to get one anytime soon, I’ll be checking in on the writers participating in the 2014 One-Page-a-Day Writing Challenge.  This group is hosted I believe by Spiritual Writers Network.

Attend at least one meeting at my local Romance Writers’ Association chapter:  This goal has been a long time coming, as in 2.5 years of saying I’d be doing it.  I found the chapter in summer 2010 and since then I’ve been pushing back their monthly meetings, but this upcoming meeting is actually hosting a critique group open to the public for a small fee.  10 pages of your manuscript or synopsis can be critiqued for a reasonable price!  I’d just be a sucker to let this one go…

I'll close my final post of the year with well wishes for everyone's' dreams and goals ('cause isn't that what this blog hop is all about, big and crazy dreams?!).  When I look back at 2013 I'll fondly--with the teeniest annoyance--remember what its 365 days have taught me:

"Just shut up and do it."

A little thing called Word Confidence (Big Dreams Blog Update Day #2)

It's that time of the month again.

UPDATE DAY!

This one's gonna be a real quick post, as I'm hardly going to scratch the surface of what I'd like to talk about.  This month has really opened my eyes to something.  I've been writing consistently since July, mostly accomplishing this by setting daily word count goals.  So here I am hitting these daily word goals but something's been off lately.  I don't always feel like I've written at all on some days, even if I know I have the words down.

Then it hit me.

Confidence.  It's a big word (but we all know it could be bigger, like the 26-letter Floccinaucinihilipilification).  I'm gonna take a deep breath with this next one:  I'm not confident in my writing.

There I said it.

I'm not confident in my writing, and that usually moves on to translate to other parts of my life.  For instance, one of my longtime hobbies--though I'm not sure you could call it that.  Procrastination would be a better fit, especially when I'm browsing through Goodreads instead of actually writing an essay, or studying for an exam.  Yeah, ahem.

Anyways, one of the 'things I like to do' is read book reviews.  And, of course, this lead me to want to write my own.  But for the past two years I've been putting it on the back-burner using excuses like "well, you're reviews are not gonna be all that funny and witty" or "someone else has already said that, so what's the point?" OR (my favorite) "Psshft! who'd wanna read your review?"  And this voice in my head sounded so darn familiar it took me a long while to realize it sounded like that sassy Internal Editor of mine.

Which comes to my point.  There's a difference between word count and word confidence.

What's word confidence?  It pretty much speaks for itself, but I'm using it here to capture that intangible feeling of accomplishment.  For the past 5 months I've been successfully hitting my word count for at least 90% of the time, but I was never satisfied because I've been lacking word confidence.  That is, not being happy with what I've written even if I have crashed through my word count goal.

December will be spent trying to find this word confidence.  I don't really know if I'll succeed, but I'm willing to try.

And while I do this, I can promise I haven't forgotten my million words.  Right now I've started a new project and I'm about 14K in.  I'm proud of what I've accomplished this month and most of that word count happened this past week.  It might not be as much as I could have had at the end of November, but I'm pretty darn proud of what I've got.

Until December then.

And she's going for two. (a.k.a. Big Dreams Blog Update Day #1)

Happy Belated Update Day!

Okay, so technically this post was to go live yesterday, but here I am!

About two months ago, I signed up on this Big Dreams Blog set up and hosted by the lovely authors, Beth Fred and Misha Gericke.  These ladies have their own crazy impressive goals, and then there’s another 16 of us who have similar craziness goings on.  But we’re all rooting for each other, and in one of those ways we update every last Friday of the month with our progress towards our goals thus far.

As you might have noticed, I didn’t really update last month.  Or the month before that (FYI, I signed up on August 15^th)…

Anyways, I plan to start giving myself that extra kick in the butt.  The whole point of this Update Day is accountability.  You’d be surprised by how many people will actually do what they say if they say it publically.  I know these things, it’s all part of social psychology (trust me, I’m a psych undergrad).

So, yeah, what was my goal?  I already mentioned it in my first official post, but in case you’re tl;dr, here’s the short version:

I want to write 1000000 words.

Yikes!  That’s a lot of zeroes.  But I think this is a great way to help me keep myself on my toes.  Of course, I didn’t explain what parameters I’ve set up that will count towards this Leviathan word goal in that first post, so I’ll list them now.

1)  All of the words should be towards projects I’ve either completed or I’m in the process of completing.  So basically what this does is make sure I don’t find loopholes where I’m also tallying half-finished projects.  Cool beans?

2)  No, writing on this blog doesn’t count towards the one million.  I know there are some writers who do this type of thing, say, for the upcoming NaNoWriMo, and that’s great for them!  Seriously, especially as I’m still getting used to managing my own posting and whatnot.  But on a personal level that’s not what I’m aiming for here.

3)  Fanfictiion does count!  This point directly relates to my current WIP.  Yes.  I am writing a fanfiction.  Why?  Because I think it’s a safe place for me now.  But right now all that’s necessary is that I am counting both fanfiction and original works towards my one million.  (I will have a separate post addressing this in the near future.  I promise)

All righty—that’s what I have so far, but I might think up of more rules…  I’m more surprised I didn’t outline these to start with, but hey, I did now, right?  J

Now I bet you’re all wondering since I started this project back on August 15^th:  where is she at so far?

*insert appropriate drum roll here*

0.

Yes, you read that correctly.  Zero, nada, zilch, zippy-poop.  Nothing.  Actually, I did have 121K towards said fanfiction WIP; however, long story short I decided to slash my wordcount and start from near-scratch.  (I’ve kept like 10K of scenes I couldn’t part with.)

Why am I not counting this 121K?  It’s because it violates Rule #1 (see above, in case you’ve forgotten).  Despite not using valuing this amount towards my goal of one million; nevertheless, I did learn much more than I thought I would! 

For instance, I learned I’m not really an outliner or a pantser—I’m more of a, to use the word of one author, “planter”.  I fall in the middle.  I definitely need some sort of outline to keep my on track, remind me of what I’m heading towards story-wise, BUT that outline can’t be crazy long either and so minutely detailed.  Otherwise I actually lose my focus.  

I like to think of this as a parabolic relationship where at the first end of the spectrum you have easy story problem and unsatisfactory emotional payoff and at the other end, difficult problem and also unsatisfying payoff.  The big yellow star is the optimal zone of average difficulty problem and highest payoff (more on this later as well).

I also learned I don't do writing out of order.  I know there are some writer tips that tell you to go ahead and jump to the scenes you're itching to write if you're stuck, but that doesn't work for me.  I spend so much time after trying to piece scenes together, and...ugh.  Yeah. I tried it and now I know that just doesn't work for me.

That’s all I really have now in terms of updating.  Next month I’ll hopefully have a better result.  (I should probably clarify that I’m not entering the NaNoWriMo.  But good luck to all who try!  I’ll be rooting each of you on.)

-Henke

And what a Thanks I'd like to give.

I KNEW this day would come.

So there's some people I'd like to thank...

*kidding*

But seriously.  What's the occasion?  Can't I post a blog in honour of Canadian Thanksgiving, eh? :)  I don't do this often...actually this is the first time I'm doing this.  But I like to think this holiday offers something more than a day off from school.  

(Though I totally appreciate the day off from school.)

What am I thankful for this year?

Well, first I'm grateful for my health.  You know, the usual stuff.  There were some distant family losses and it really put it into perspective just how much I've come to appreciate life.

And part of that appreciation includes doing the things I like.  For instance, writing.  If you happen to be part of my immediate family--ha.--you'll know I've been saying that I'm going to write a book one day.

That official announcement came 4-5 years ago, and since 2009 I haven't finished a single  project.  Not even one.  But every day over that near-half decade I'd wake up with a renewed resolve to start the story that I'd finish.  The thing is, as you smart people have already put together I'm sure, a "full-length" novel isn't written in one day.  Had I been writing a short story I might have followed Poe's advice and skipped off to write a short story worthy of a single sitting.

But I didn't want to write a short story.  (And I still don't want to write a short story.)

Back then--right now, I want to conquer the dreaded novel.  However, I decided a new approach was necessary.  And because I'm totally lazy I'll just go ahead and put the rest of my journey in point form:

end of June 2013:

-decide to start small and work my way to the big mountain and I roll my sleeves up in preparation for my 30K run in the coming CampNaNo; my goal was to write a novella fanfic (something around that ~30K)

July 2013:

-half-ass particupation in CampNaNo, and I give up on the 30K goal by the 3rd day.  Yeah.  And all I have for my half-week effort is 903 words.  *facepalm at my crappy resolve*

July 19th, 2013:

-on this day I came home from a night class and I'm butt-tired, getting prepared for exams and last-minute writing of a critique report for said class; however, instead of focusing on my school work, I get a spark for a new direction to tackle the fanfic idea; I write 527 words,

the rest of July, 2013:

-CampNaNo ends and I'm 8000 words short of the 30K goal.  (I tried.  Really I did!  I wrote every day.)  Also I learn that this fanfic isn't going to be short, and I maybe....maybe should have outlined beforehand.

August-October 2013:

-I'd like to say I wrote every day, but over this near 2.5 months I tallied 13 days where I succumbed to the blasted sparkly new ideas.;  I hit 50K (for the first time ever!) on September 13th, and I write a blog post to preserve the milestone if you want to click on over for that.

October 14th, 2013 (today!):

-Hit....*drumroll*...100K.

So what am I grateful for you ask?  I'm grateful for the chance to hit 100K, and I owe it to my health, my family and a lot of online people, who don't know I virtually stalk them, within the reading/writing community.

What now?  Well, to be honest, I'm not any closer to finishing this fanfic, BUT I'm hoping to update with the news of that soon.  Like next month soon.  (Blogging once a month makes that feasible.)  And now I have all of you to hold me to a promise to hit "THE END".

*turns mic*

Now what are you all Thankful for?  (Well, at least those of you who are on this side of the International Boundary.)

A Memorable 13th

Oh.  Where has this near-month gone?

I don't imagine I'll be posting all this much this September either.  So sorry.  Though I can't imagine there are too much of you reading this post.

So a quick update is in order:

1) I want to my first concert ever--like ever.  It was absolutely effin amazeballs!  But you don't want to hear that.  So here's the quick stats:  the band playing was Biilly Talent.  My love for their music kicked off in early 2006 with their, then hit, "Devil in a Midnight Mass"--and, lo serendiptity in all her glory, they kicked off the concert with, you guessed it, "hold your breath and count to four...".  -headbang-  The cherry on top of this minty chocolatey chippy ice cream  (and yes, there was a lot of screaming) was the tickets were $10 a pop, AND I paid last minute at the door at T-minus 30 minutes before the concert (and fun!) begun.  The venue was small and cozy, a great ambiance over all for a last-minute charity event.  So it worked out really swell for me because I had to skip out on an earlier concert they held in my home city back in April of this year.  This was all just meant to be...  (I have some footage I may put up at a later date.)

2) In other news--on the writing front--I hit 50K (for the first time, ahhhh! -freak out-) two days ago...but I'm not done writing the story and it was more of a "yay!  whoopie!" than a "everyone, something amazing has just happened".  <--- this will probably happen with my family when I am done.

So where do I go from here?  I continue to write, hit my daily word count goals and just avoid giving into my evil other self (a.k.a. the infamous "internal editor").  Till then, I mush on.

P.S.  Okay, I did celebrate a bit.  I got a promise ring...on my ear.  Well, a helix ring actually.  See I've been wanting another helix for a while so it fit together all so well.  I figure this way all the throbbing will remind me of my promise to myself to actually finish this story in its 3-6 months average healing time.  (Which would make it my first, if you hadn't gotten that already, y'know.)  I'm so cruel to myself...the lengths I'll go to, I wonder.

Maybe I'll go ahead and hunt down a book-themed earring once it's all healed up.  Who knows? :)

999 bottles of So Good on the wall

Okay.  First post.  Should have probably thought this through, but I figure I want these posts to be real raw.  I might do some future planning, but I'll probably do the whole prepare-a-speech-and-picture-readers-naked (*cough*) thing, so...yeah.  Probably good I'm doing the impromptu bit.

My inspiration for starting a blog is one part due to that famous saying between writers, along the lines of "you need to write one million words of bullplop before you can get one good word down".  So, not counting these words, I still have one million words--and I'm trying SO damn hard not to try to count these words.  Anyways, then I came across a little treasure of a blog post by Wings author Aprilynne Pike.

Not 'm not always about challenges, but I couldn't get the thrill of this one out of my head.  After some quick math I came to the conclusion that if I write 1000 words a day for 1000 days (<-- yeah.  I know.  Bear with me.) that I could have those million words in the palm of my hand--err, I mean, on my computer screen.

Though I'm jumping into what could be a very shallow pool only to surface from this word vomit very much dead, I've accepted the challenge and embark on the 1000 words a day spree on this day, the fourteenth of August in the year twenty-thirteen...

And for those of you too lazy to add, that'd be writing from today, ohh, until May 8th, 2016.  Mhmmm.  Friggin' 2016.  Now I'm considering hard liquor under $30.*

Side note: I might totally become an alcoholic by the end of this adventure...

*says the mid-sized teetotalist.